Gabrielle d'Estrees, 1594

Friday, October 8, 2010

The Art of Vajazzling

By now, I'm sure most of you know what vajazzling is. But if you think it’s a new dance workout, then you are wrong.  Basically its combines the words Vagina and Bedazzle to form a brand new activity.  If you are still lost, then let me be blunt: Vagazziling is when you stick rhinestones on vagina.  Not in your vagina. On it!  
Jennifer Love Hewitt was the first celebrity (to my knowledge, at least) that shined some sparkling light on Vajazzling.  However Kathy Griffin was the first to be happily photographed with her disco ball Vajajay for the world to see.  As a publicity stunt to raise money for cancer, she held the first national public Pap smear.  That’s right, she spread her glory for thousands of people to watch as a doctor used a speculum to check her out. Beforehand, she mentioned that she wanted to vajazzle to get ready for her big close up!

The stunt worked. At least in that it made everyone talk about her "holy grail" of a vag.  And it helped raise awareness for cervical cancer.  It also raised awareness on vajazzling. So, in effort to continue raising awareness, I would like to speak a little on the topic of vajazzling. Personally, I have been known to vajazzle on occasion and I actually kind of love it! 
But first, a disclaimer. I want to make it completely clear that I don’t think women need to perfect their pussies at all.  They are gorgeous on their own. Vajazzling for beauty reasons alone is bullshit.  Think of it as more of a fun adventure.  Maybe a surprise for your guy (or girl) or maybe just something to make you feel a little more badass when you walk down the street.  Your own dirty little secret.  
Two years ago I took a class in New York at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts.  The class is simply incredible. It’s really life changing... but that is another story for another day.  Anyway, this class was my first personal exposure to vajazzling. My classmates and I had to “decorate” ourselves during the first week. Most of us were initially creeped out by the idea of decorating our pussies, but everyone was a good sport and went along with it. We all chose carefully among temporary tattoos, gems and glitter. Then each of us decorated ourselves, realizing how ridiculous it was. But it was also a lot of fun.

I guess I seem to smile a bit more when I’m vajazzled.  I don’t take my boss too seriously, I don’t take my relationships too seriously but most importantly I don’t take myself too seriously.  I can’t and won’t keep up with vajazzling weekly, but I encourage everyone to try it at least once.  If you’re a bit intimidated, try buying a set of cute temporary tattoos.  Or click here if you want to design your own tattoo.  Maybe you can write your lovers name with a heart or just simply  “suck it”.  

I’ve talked to men about their opinions on vajazzling and frankly I think the idea scares the shit out of them.  But I can also vouch that most women I’ve spoken to that unveiled these arts and crafts projects were totally embraced by their lovers.  Why?  My guess is that whenever women get excited about their pussies, so do men.  Simple as that. 

So if you’re single, taken, gay, straight, pissed off, bored or just an attention seeker I think every woman should give Vajazzling a shot. Remember how much fun stickers and colorforms was when you were a kid? Now bring that fun to your vaginas! 

You remember Colorforms right?

1 comment: