Well I did it! I've been dreaming of having my own kooky blog for thepast six months and without further ado, here it is! Presenting toeveryone, The Bitch You Can't Scratch. Get it Bitch/Itch? Meh. Anywho,I'm sure you are all wondering who exactly this "bitch" is.*For the past two years, my life's curiosity has developed into ahealthy (or some may say "unhealthy") perversion... err, I meanpassion... for the tales from our sex lives. Needless to say I'mincredibly fond of the work of Dr. Alfred Kinsey who in 1940's, gotthousands of people to open up about the "ins and outs" of their sexlives. One of my recent ventures has been loosely interviewingdifferent people on the same subject. In these past few months, I'velearned that our sex lives offer hilarious, sometimes surprising andalways awesome stories that people rarely tell.*Well, I'm here to tell them. From the archives of my research to thearchives of my own bedroom, these are the best stories never told.Yes, my research is a little more tongue and cheek than Mr. Kinsey,but its important never the less. The only thing I've altered in thesestories are names, out of respect for my friends. So here we go!*One question that Kinsey first posed was "When was your first sexualexperience?" This question really got my interest, and what a fittingquestion for my first entry. Now I'm not talking about when you lostyour virginity or even that first blow job. I want to go back evenfurther. When did you first notice you could receive pleasure downthere? How did you find out? Here are three, short and simple stories.*One friend had her first clitoral discovery in a swimming pool. Whilepeacefully floating on a noodle, some jerk abruptly pulled it awayfrom her. She just so happened to be sitting on this noodle and thewhen it was pulled out from between her legs, a jolt of unexplainedelectricity surprised her and made her feel oh so good. In a way, thisjerk was responsible for her first sexual experience. And creepyenough that jerk was her cousin.*One male interviewee couldn't remember his first boner, but easilyrecalled his first orgasm. He described it to me as a happy accident.He had fallen asleep on his stomach and while wiggling around to getcomfortable, he accidently rubbed his genitals on his bed. It feltgood, so he kept going... and going... and going and then boom!Being in the fifth grade, he knew what masturbation was, but wasn'tsure if thats what he had just done. There was no jerking... justrubbing. But hey, whatever works!*Another friend did remember his first boner... he just didn'tremember why he got it. He only remembered the strange anduncomfortable feeling. Like any little honest five year old he ran totell his Mommy and said "my pee pee hurts". I love what her answerwas so innocent yet so true "Honey you're just excited!"*Well, if you are still reading this, congratulations you are just asdirty a pervert as I am! Just kidding! You are a normal, curioussexual being just like the ten's of thousands Kinsey interviewees.For the record, I really encourage participation whether it becomments, thoughts or even wanting to share your private yet pricelessstories with me. You can message me and I can promise your names willbe 100% confidential. After all, why can't we talk honestly andintimately about our sex lives? I know I will.*I'm really excited to jump into this new chapter of my research. I feel likea boy who just got his first boner. I'm not entirely sure what to do withit, but with some help and encouragement, it could be a real blast!
Friday, September 24, 2010
Posted by RSaint at 10:06 PM